Book Information

Book ID Asin: 1455516902
Book Title: Adulting: How to Become a Grown-up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps
Book Author: Kelly Williams Brown
Book Format and Price:
Book Format Name: Kindle
Book Format Price: $9.99
Book Format Name: Audiobook
Book Format Price: $0.00
Book Format Name: Paperback
Book Format Price: $9.00
Book Price: $9.00
Book Category: Books, Crafts, Hobbies & Home, Home Improvement & Design and unknown
Book Rating: 1,709 ratings

Book Product Detail

• Best Sellers Rank: #569,152 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #504 in Cooking Humor
  • #1,022 in Home Cleaning, Caretaking & Relocating
  • #1,356 in Love, Sex & Marriage Humor

• Customer Reviews:
  4.5 out of 5 stars 1,709 ratings

Book Review

Name: R. A. Williams
Rating: 2.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Written by and for extremely privileged people
Date: Reviewed in the United States on April 6, 2019
Review: I bought this book as a gift for my daughter who has moved out on her own, but I read it first to make sure the advice was good. I won't be giving this book. The author's cavalier and flippant approach to illegal activity is dead wrong because if my daughter follows this advice she'll end up in an early grave. The laundry list of material things people "need" to furnish a home and a kitchen are far beyond the dreams of most Americans, as are the clothing, shoes, restaurant meals, and other luxuries the author pretends she can get away with having without paying for them.

In the real world, where most people live, there are major consequences to illegal drug use. The advice to "go smoke some weed" as a recreational drug (page 280) fails to take into account that such activities still violate federal law and most state laws. Recreational drug use, such as the cocaine use and binge drinking the author mentions throughout the book, lead to addiction and work problems. Most people live in a world where you can't get a job without passing a drug test, and where random drug tests are just part of life. Internships are rare in the real world, and the author also speaks of college as though it's something everyone can afford to do. She pays no attention whatsoever to student loan debt, focusing instead on how much fun it is to spend, spend, spend and what a hardship it is to save.

Privileged people, who are above the law, can also get away with "strategically" bouncing checks (page 153) or keeping the Diet Coke served after one's debit card is declined at a drive-through restaurant (page 152). In the real world, if there's not enough in the account to pay for a restaurant meal, the solution is to NOT go to the drive-through restaurant. That's how you live an honest life. Likewise, an honest person is aware of his or her duties to other humans. If you're going to participate in the adult world by, say, owning and driving a car you are also legally and morally required to carry liability insurance to protect other human beings from the consequences of your mistakes. Only an extremely privileged person ignores his or her responsibilities to others.

A privileged person can afford to travel to other cities for conferences. For most people just starting out, the jobs that are available are more likely to be dirty, dangerous, and monotonous.

In real life, there are three ways out of money problems: find a way to earn more (such as by taking a second or third job), find a way to consume less (such as by eating at home instead of at restaurants), and some combination of both. Continuing to go to restaurants or shopping when you have credit card debt, or finding ways to live it up on other people's expense, is not "adult" behavior. Nor is it honest.

A privileged person can "hook up" with as many people as they like because they can afford health insurance and the services of the gynecologist the author references so frequently. She may be able to afford round after round of Pap smears and co-pays for the various bouts of venereal disease that are the natural consequences of bed-hopping, but most people can't. For most people, there are serious medical and social consequences to casual sex. An unplanned pregnancy, for example, is life-changing to most people who live in the real world. Giving up a child for adoption, or having an abortion, is something that creates life-long social consequences for the people who do it because it's incredibly stigmatizing. Part of being an adult involves managing your sex life, if you have one, and having a plan in case you're faced with an unplanned or unwanted pregnancy.

In the real world, if you surround yourself with people who are using illegal drugs, playing financial games, and otherwise winking and nodding at the law, eventually you're going to either start doing the same things yourself or be on the receiving end for people who need someone to steal from. There's an entire chapter on friends, but nothing about making sure the people you hang out with aren't bringing you down or limiting your options long-term. There are some things a young person simply can't be afford to be involved with.

I understand that it's fashionable in the United States to give people under the age of 30 a pass for doing stupid and dishonorable things, yet people engaged in stupid and dishonorable activity probably shouldn't be writing books about how to be an adult.

Name: Kaitlin Armes
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Good book
Date: Reviewed in the United States on September 8, 2022
Review: Needed for a college class! Worked fine.

Name: Nenia Campbell
Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Definitely seems to skew towards a middle class and white readership
Date: Reviewed in the United States on March 26, 2022
Review: I bought this a while ago thinking it might be a funny, quasi-informative collection of essays about the struggle of being adulting, but no, it is an actual step-by-step guide separated into various categories about how to "adult," ranging from things like setting boundaries with your parents to treating LGBT+ and people of color with respect to basic and easy recipes on what to cook alone.

I thought this book was fine. It would be a good gift for someone 18-21, I think, but I can think of plenty of older people I know who would probably benefit from such a gift (although giving it to them might be construed as passive-aggressive, so I'd refrain). Some things in this book are common sense but it does seem to skew white, middle-class, and cis-het (see the section on how to treat trans people). Also, I have an edit to suggest on the off-chance that the author or the pub sees this: ending the how to be PC section with a "this book's spirit animal is a thank you note" joke comes across as a little tone deaf. I've tried to remove that phrase from my vocabulary myself because apparently a lot of Native people find it offensive.

So yes, this would be a great book for someone who is off to college or leaving home. The collection of recipes and list of basic pantry items is especially helpful and I like that ADULTING tackles difficult topics, like being there for others in times of grief, talking to your parents about wills and trusts, and how to measure the health of your friendships and remove toxic people from your life. I probably won't be keeping this one but I can definitely see the merit in it.

3 out of 5 stars

Name: heidi taylor
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Good
Date: Reviewed in the United States on July 30, 2022
Review: Gave this book to my daughter for Christmas. I hope she reads it. Since she won’t listen to me Mom

Name: Angela Risner The Sassy Orange
Rating: 4.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Good advice for recent grads, even for older folks
Date: Reviewed in the United States on December 27, 2013
Review: I enjoy the Adulting blog when I get a chance to read it, so I thought the book would be a fun, easy read. It was. I think it's written in a way most kids (and yes, I call twenty-somethings "kids," which is the first sign that I'm way older) will find accessible, yet it doesn't cross over into that "hey, you're trying too hard to sound like me" vibe.

There's solid advice here, without being preachy. I found a few new things for this old dog, too, such as Step 8: Remember your circle of concern versus your circle of action. It's sort of like an updated version of the Serenity Prayer.

Not every piece of advice is one that I would follow, though. It may be tempting to call a co-worker the c-word, but I wouldn't recommend it. I think you can handle conflict without calling people names.

Some favorite moments:

•We all sense our own dysfunction so clearly. And because we can't do that one thing - whether it be keeping a clean house, not feeling shy and awkward at work, or having a credit score of 750 - we assign it a higher priority on our own personal Things That You Must Be Good At If You Wish to Be a Functional Adult list. We don't remember the fourteen things we do reasonably well; we remember our one arena of miserable failure.
•Intentions are nice, but ultimately intentions don't really matter because they only exist inside you.
•A big part of being a well-adjusted person is accepting that you can't be good at everything. Some things will always be hard. Decide what you can do in those arenas.
•You're a grown-up, and you get to decide what behaviors affect you for five minutes versus what behaviors change you as a person.
•As my friend Kate put it, if you don't like someone and they don't like you, that's not a problem, that's mutual agreement.
•You know why movies are so satisfying? Because they reflect back a reality that we all wish were true, that being good is its own reward and that being right means we will win.
• The value of the relationship is not in the uninterrupted continuity of same-level friendship, but in the fact that you can be friends at twelve, twenty, twenty-five. So don't freak out if you're not close friends for six months when you're twenty-three. You won't ever make any new old friends. Don't get mad at them, or yourself, if it's not exactly the same as it used to be. A lot of times you'll find that after a few years, you'll feel closer again.
•Being in a real, grown-up relationship means deciding every day to love another person, even though sometimes they will annoy the everlasting s*** out of you. Everything needs maintenance. Loving someone is not a onetime thing, something earned once then secured forever. It's more like a human six-year-old, something delightful but also in need of vigilance and attention, lest it fall out of a tree and break its wrist.
•People can and do change. When they want to.
•We all want "closure." But that doesn't make closure any more of a real thing than, say, a kind and gentle Pegasus who is eager to read your unpublished novel...In real life, closure comes from months or years of perspective, reflection, and insight. Or it doesn't - some things close, some don't.

Definitely recommended for the younger set, but older set will likely enjoy as well.

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